Real Change

I attended the Exodus Regional Conference this past weekend. It was my new friend Scott who told me about it, and before I knew it I was heading down I-94 to Green Lake, Wisconsin for the event with him and his friend David. There were good times of worship, a very good speaker, and many like me who are journeying out of same-sex attraction.

I have attended three of these events: one in 80’s in Madison, one in the 90’s in St. Paul, and this one. Over the weekend I was able to reflect on the change that has taken place in my soul as the years have gone by. In the 80’s, I remember going to an event like this and becoming “preoccupied” (I’m not sure how else to say it) with one of the male attendees. This time, however, it was a female at the conference that captured my attention more than anyone else.

What it is so striking about this change is that it is in no way forced. I do not feel like I need to be married or have a girlfriend or even be attracted to women. I am content and am well past the typical marrying season. God has made my life very full. I understand that my celibacy is a gift from Him and I am truly thankful for it. But there I was, tying to get a good look at this woman whenever the opportunity arose.

So though I am not married (and don’t expect to be) I am an example of a true change.

There have been several who, when they have become aware my coaching work, express concern over the possibility of “falling” with a client. I won’t say that this is completely impossible. But it is an opportunity to explain that same-sex attraction is something that one can grow out of, if you are willing to put forth the effort. Once you grow into manhood, men become less interesting and women much more.

Yes, it took decades. But it doesn't have to. And that is why it thrills me to be able to coach other men around this issue. Change is indeed possible and I've never been more certain.

Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him." Genesis 2:18